For old times' sake

Today I finally get to update my blog. It's been quite a while. Things have happened.


I started to officially update this blog a year ago. And now;; pejam celik pejam celik a year had already past. Ohh;; wowww...


I still feel like a fifteen year-old;; but in truth;; I'm already sixteen. Some of my grandmother's friends marry at sixteen. What I wanna emphasize is how slow today's teenagers grow mentally.


Mature?? I don't feel mature! I even dreamt of being in Peter Pan's circumstance;; not growing up for forever and ever. That would be awesome;; no?? 

Then I wouldn't have any obligations to anyone;; not even myself. People will take care of me;; and I wouldn't be expected to take care of others. Attractive prospect;; no?? To me;; it truly is.


My dreams have shifted quite a bit. Now I think of the future with more realistic lines to adher by. I think it's kinda for the better. Though if you look at it from another point of view;; some people would say that my naivette was killed by this change in me.


I always want to do something artistic. 

Writing? I like it. 
Drawing? My long-time love.
Doodling? I do it occassionally.


I love to do so many things.. At times I'm not sure what I really wanna do with my life. I've thought over alot about how my future will turn out to be. Seems to me I only remember the sweeter ones.


Last year I would laugh with abandon spntaneously.
This year I try to find time and excuse to laugh out loud.

It's not easy to laugh nowadays. My schedule has a major makeover;; starting last week;; Wednesday to be exact.


You know the feeling of getting caught in the middle of a web of tangled up dreams and hopes of our parents? Pretty much like that. Feels like Iike I was  swimming freely in my own sea;; in my own world;; until suddenly my limbs were caught up by that net my parents casted. I didn't know why I suddenly want to be free at all. I mean;; I love my family;; and I kinda agree with my parents' method of teaching me about life and stuff...


Whoaa... Caught me off-guard;; that month did. Suddenly responsibilities were thrown at me like pieces of bread thrown at pigeons.


There's this story of a guy who went to the beach and started counting the beads of sand there. This story was something like that;; never-ending. If it wasn't me who's feeling like this;; generations to come teenagers still feel like this around my age.


Hope the mature years will come sooner!


Ahaa ;P